Zildjian L80 low volume practice cymbals
Here's something to go along with Remo's Silentstroke drumheads. These are the Zildjian L80 low volume cymbals. A standard-size set of these will run you about $300 but at least then you could play in your tiny NYC apartment without bothering your next door neighbors.
Remo Silentstroke practice drumheads
I haven't heard of these until now. Remo makes a single ply mesh drumhead that can be used for low volume practicing on a drumset. The heads are available in almost every normal drumhead size and prices start around $10.
DW Drums Go Anywhere practice drumset
This is actually pretty neat. I'd much rather have this than an electric drumset for quiet practicing. The DW Go Anywhere practice drumset is a compact 5-piece "kit" that lets you practice on a seemingly full drumset without any of the noise. Good for small apartments. Wish I had this back at 146.
The best part? This is only $180.