Holiday Memories

Listen to this man make the same joke over and over and over and over again to his fiancee. She's a good sport. This makes me sad. Sad sad sad. 

Best Friends Build Shared Memory Networks

I forget which book I read this in, but a few years back (around the time I was living in Los Angeles), I remember reading about how long-married couples often find it hard to live separate lives once divorced because a literal part of their memory bank ends up being missing. I remember at the time thinking about how true this was for me and how I often rely on a partner's own memories and knowledge of a specific topic to work alongside my own memory strengths.

There are two different structures of a TMS—differentiated and integrated. In an integrated TMS, friends share similar knowledge and are able to reinforce or remind each other of what they know. In a differentiated TMS, they have knowledge of different things, and can consult each other like encyclopedias. The researchers found that in mixed-gender best friendships, TMSs were more likely to be differentiated, while in same-gender best friendships, they were more likely to be integrated. But regardless of the gender makeup, the systems were equally strong.

In the last few weeks, I've come face to face with the absence of this memory network and I find myself struggling at times to fill in memory gaps or knowledge of where/how to find certain information. I know based on past experience that this is never permanent, but it doesn't minimize how sucky it is to suddenly lose that transitive memory system. More specifically, it sucks to not have the other half of the story concerning 2 year's worth of photos. I've always hated having files deleted, but I think this time around, I'd gladly taken deleted files over lost stories from my other half. I'm sure I'll find a way. What did I do the last time this happened? I think I talked to my cats a lot (Tygra and Pepper, I miss you!).

Tang's Donuts & Sandwiches

Did I know about this? I'm not 100% sure, but I think I did. I was in this area today in Silver Lake and I came across the empty storefront of what used to be Tang's Donuts & Sandwiches. It struck a particular chord with me seeing it closed and empty yet with that bright yellow, red, and blue sign out in front. I don't think I ever wrote about this before, so I'll try to put it into words (I haven't been good with words lately).

Anyway, Tang's was one of the few places in LA that reminds me of genuine joy while I lived here. Those of you who have followed this blog for a while might know that I had a short stint living in LA and I more or less hated it. But Tang's...Tang's was that light on a shining hill for me. Tang's was the moment late in my stay in LA when I realized that maybe, just maybe, I'd miss LA if I ever moved away. It was the home base of the Wolfpack Hustle LA Marathon crash race and the location of where I truly connected with the city, saw the city for what it was and wasn't, and ultimately decided that maybe I wasn't made for this place. It's the site of great things and memories for me despite extreme loneliness in this city.

For the sake of sounding a little too emo, just know this: Tang's makes me sentimental for all the things I love about LA. Confusing? Yeah, I know. Sad to see it go.